They said that I can't save everybody.

I knew her before it all
quiet, comforted -
warm and safe
knowing nothing else

I felt her before it all
languid and curled -
soft and unyielding
pristine, untouched, perfect

I saw her before it all
beautiful beyond measure -
her eyes, that naive wonder
that the innocent wear

I held her before it all
trembling nestled
into my heart, in my warmth
blinking away the tears

I cried before it all
my memory haunted
by typed white pages
and colour coded stickers

I knew before it all
saw the confusion
in those beautiful eyes
hoped for something different

I felt before it all
the pain, the soul deep
scars that never heal
that I couldn't stitch together

I saw before it all
the knowing that somehow
it should be otherwise
and yet it had always been this way

I held before it all
and pretended that I could
go home and not care
but I can't

I cried before it all
for the eyes that I
could not save and that
I will always see