Monday, 16 November 2009

The Color and the Shape

"Do you come from a land down under? Where women glow and men plunder?" Iconic lyrics that were penned surely, on a day like today. Where the rising heat by mid morning sucked back into your lungs and withdrew half of your spirit with it. I went to the gym this morning in a mood for some punishment and have been flushed and "glowing" ever since. Even after a shower and the ducted aircon.

I've been a bit half hearted with the gym for the last fortnight. The Possum's non-sleeping reaching crisis point pushed me over the edge, and even though I was still going regularly I wasn't doing much more than a few brisk kilometres on the treadmill while watching TV or an easy hill climb cycle on the stationary bikes. Unenthused and meh about it all.

Today I wanted to hurt. Wanted to feel the deep ache in my muscles and the virtuous twinges when I left. Wanted to feel the burn in my abdominals with inspiration. To feel the slight shudder and tremor in biceps that have been punished. To feel weak in my deltoids, and the wince of pain in changing gears in the car on the way home.

I was angry with myself today. Wanted to focus that deep within and unleash a torrent of abuse. And I did. Lashing at myself until I was flayed and bleeding. Stumbling out into the glaring sunshine I took a deep breath of thick viscous heat and pulled it back into my screaming lungs, and smiled. Because a beating that good feels damned good.

1 comment:

Blythe said...

Oh, I know that wanting to hurt. I want it too. However, I'm just too lazy. I keep saying it's because I don't have a gym membership, but really, it's pure L.A.Z.Y.


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