It's about the time of year that we make promises that never last and plan to do things with our fingers crossed tightly behind our backs. I make a swathe of them each year, and on the whole I'm not so bad at it. I keep the "spirit" of most even if the flesh is weak. I've been pretty good with the exercise thing this year and have really enjoyed going to the gym. I;m still married and the kids still speak to me, so that seems to be going ok as well.
So, with this being the dawn of the new decade (just not the same ring to it as the new millennium is it?) I've decided that 2010 is going to be about me. I'm going to start putting myself a little bit more up the priority list, get better at saying no, and enjoy being a 28 year old woman with a stupendous life in front of her.
That all sounds very earnest no? Well how about some mini goals?
First of all I'm going to keep getting my hair cut every 6 weeks or so. At a proper salon. Where I have my own preferred stylist and I'm not going on cheap student Tuesday. I'll even buy the recommended products occasionally even if I'm allergic to upselling.
Secondly, I'm going to buy a luxe moisturiser. When I was pregnant with the boy I had lush hair and skin and kind of got addicted to it. It's nice to glow instead of looking like an oil slick or the dessicated bit of your Mum's heel. I've never paid much attention to beauty products before, because me and beauty in the same sentence was a bit of an oxymoron. And like a moron, I hid in my ugly clothes, bad hair cut and terrible skin for most of this decade. BUT! No more!
I actually tried to buy one in the post Christmas sales the other day, but baulked at firstly the $140 pricetag at the Lancome counter, and secondly when she talked about my mid-30s, pre-ageing skin. I had better luck at the Shiseido counter where she talked about my "youthful skin" (I'm so fucking vain) but I ended up buying a cleanser instead because they had sample moisturisers in the "gift with" pack (I love these packs. I have about 12 mini mascaras).
Third one is a bit of a follow on from the above, in that I'm going to wear my makeup and perfume on days other than weddings/funerals/dates. I still can't abide foundation, but a sweep of mascara can make my eyes look awesome and they're my favourite feature so why not.
I can hear some of my low maintenance friends snickering into their coffees as I write this, but I've decided to give all this a go for at least a year. Try it out. I've allowed myself to be in photos this year too. Smiled for them. Let Bingley take pictures of me playing with the kids and documented my thrilledness with my corset. It's not all about the superficial here. It's also about how I feel about myself.
I've had years of congratulating myself on how low maintenance I am. About how I don't fall into those superficial traps of make up and "hair" and clothes. And I've not been scarred by the experience, but neither have I been empowered. It kind of sucks to go out at night looking like the poor country cousin being dragged along by their glamorous friend. To go to the shops and look like a harrassed mother of 3.
I like going out and being completely anonymous. Of being 28 and people not automatically being able to guess that I'm a SAHM with no time or inclination for herself. I love my children dearly. They inspire me and guide me and teach me every single day (and not just to drink wine). When I look like I could be anyone or do anything, I feel much the same way. Maybe I'm just superficial. I *do* love shiny things after all.
So anyhow, there's my pretty pathetic list. Of course world peace is in there too. I'll schedule it in once I've had my blowdry.